Have you experienced discouragement to a point where you feel like you have lost ground on your ability to believe? We should expect periods in our life where hope is involuntarily challenged to a point where it can give way to despair. Yes, “despair cometh because of iniquity”1 – but we should remember that iniquity is also defined as “grossly unfair behavior.”2 Mortality was not designed to be fair – or a meritocracy – hence, bad things happen to good people (sometimes really bad and seemingly never-ending).
Facing unfair problems is baked into the fabric of life and is often not a reflection of choices we make. One of the key ingredients to facing these types of challenges successfully is the answer no one wants to hear: patience.
Patience is “the capacity to trust God as you face delay, opposition, or suffering… [it] is not idleness or passive resignation. It is ‘cheerfully [doing] all things that lie in [your] power’ as you serve God.”3
Patience “Sidles” All Christlike Attributes
In episode 162 of Seinfeld, Elaine is working at Pendant publishing where her new coworker, Lou, moves with such stealth that Elaine does not know he is there. She had several experiences where she was presenting her ideas or work to the CEO, and was surprised to hear “great work you two!” She would turn to find Lou next to her – receiving credit for work he did not do – to which he would become known as the “sidler.”4
Patience, in a similar way, “sidles” other virtues that help us make real progress, discover meaning, or experience joy. Patience is always a necessary condition for growth and is networked to “anything virtuous, lovely, or of good report.”5 That means that when patience is replaced with impatience, the larger structure of our faith and emotional well-being becomes unstable.
So, to put it plainly, without patience sidling along in the struggle of our lives, we have less spiritual, mental, emotional, physical, and social capacity. There will be less in our lives – both in terms of what we are able to receive and able to give. Perhaps this is why the Lord “seeth fit” to try our “patience and [our] faith”6 – because without doing so, we would be unable to receive “all that [God has].”7
As the world continues to make strides in terms of ease of use and instantaneous resolutions, those wonderful gains may expose losses to the soul and community. Patience, in particular, may be under assault as we experience what one author once termed “the tyranny of convenience.”8
Charity Without Patience Is? … Well, Not Charity.
The Apostle Paul and Moroni made the effort to help us know what charity is – and, of equal importance, what charity is not. Speaking in tongues, for example, is truly a miracle and spiritual gift – but if not powered by charity – it is muted in its effect. Having faith to remove mountains if not powered with charity means we amount to nothing. Even giving away all that we have profits us nothing if not powered by charity.
Well, how do we know if we possess charity? Paul’s first condition in describing what charity is – “charity suffereth long”9 – suggests that if our love lacks patience, it is not charity. There are other descriptors that pay homage to the full integration of patience into what charity is. We can use these standards to conduct a simple self-assessment:
- Would others recognize that we are patient enough to “not be easily provoked?”
- Are we patient enough to “[bear] all things” and “[endure] all things?”
- Has our love patiently endured the test of time such that it “never faileth” – meaning it is always dependable?
We are invited to “pray unto the Father with all the energy of heart, that [we] may be filled with this love, which he [bestows] upon all who are true followers of his Son, Jesus Christ.”10 Like the impact of impurities on an electrical wire, a little lack of patience can limit God’s ability to conduct a current of charity into our souls. Impatience can cause us to believe the process doesn’t work – when, in reality, we were not in a full position to receive.
The Trial of Faith Worketh Patience
The first five verses of the Book of James would be the catalyst for the Restoration. Preceding the invitation to ask God for wisdom were these powerful teachings about patience: “[Know] this, that the trying of your faith worketh patience. [So] let patience have her perfect work, that ye may be perfect and entire, wanting nothing.”11
Let patience have her perfect work that we may be entire, wanting nothing?!? Letting patience work sounds almost like learning to let go – let go of our schedule, our expectations, and our attitudes and hand over a certain amount of our control. Yet, that is precisely what faith is – not disputing during difficulty because the witness is after the trial of our faith,12 after our patience has been worked and more fully developed.
Increased patience means increased capacity for faith and growth. Elder D. Todd Christofferson once faced a trial that, to him, was inescapable. He noted:
“Though I suffered then, as I look back now, I am grateful that there was not a quick solution to my problem. The fact that I was forced to turn to God for help almost daily over an extended period of years taught me truly how to pray and get answers to prayer and taught me in a very practical way to have faith in God. I came to know my Savior and my Heavenly Father in a way and to a degree that might not have happened otherwise or that might have taken me much longer to achieve. … I learned to trust in the Lord with all my heart. I learned to walk with Him day by day.”13
Yes, in our lives “tribulation worketh patience,”14 but patience can clearly render so much more than just relief of tribulation – as, in Elder Christofferon’s case, being forced to patiently and repeatedly turn to God resulted in the more excellent gifts of faith, trust, and of a closer relationship with God.
Patience and the Spiritual Chemistry of the Soul
Neal A. Maxwell noted that:
“Patience is always involved in the spiritual chemistry of the soul, not only when we try to turn the trials and tribulations…but also when we use it to build upon the seemingly ordinary experiences to bring about happy and spiritual outcomes. Patience is, therefore, clearly not fatalistic, shoulder-shrugging resignation. It is the acceptance of a divine rhythm to life; it is obedience prolonged. Patience stoutly resists pulling up the daisies to see how the roots are doing. Patience is never condescending or exclusive—it is never glad when others are left out. Patience never preens itself; it prefers keeping the window of the soul open.”15
Patience is woven into the spiritual chemistry of the soul because impatience is the instinct of the natural man. Putting off the natural man means (among other things) becoming patient and “willing to submit to all things which the Lord seeth fit to inflict”16 upon us. Clearly, therefore, impatience is contrary to the nature of Jesus Christ. He gives us inspired patience every second, of every hour, of every day. How have we benefited from the Savior’s patience? How often do we need to repent repeatedly for the same sin, just in different times and circumstances? Do we appreciate the patience required to first show us, and then help us over time, transition our weaknesses into strengths?17
The natural man would assume that God would simply lose His patience and cut us off. The natural man probably thinks we would deserve that kind of treatment. But really, from your experience, does that ever happen? Lest God is a hypocrite, then clearly His posture towards us would suffer long, be easy to be entreated, and not easily provoked.
Wow! Pondering God’s patience inspires a newfound confidence in Him. Why would we second guess pursuing Someone who so clearly loves us, believes in us, and has perfect patience with our process of growth? As Elder Uchtdorf noted:
“As the Lord is patient with us, let us be patient with those we serve. Understand that they, like us, are imperfect. They, like us, make mistakes. They, like us, want others to give them the benefit of the doubt. Never give up on anyone. And that includes not giving up on yourself.”18
CS Lewis once wrote how the Lord’s patience is what produced His boundless capacity to understand all things:
“A man who gives in to temptation after five minutes simply does not know what it would have been like an hour later. That is why bad people, in one sense, know very little about badness. They have lived a sheltered life by always giving in. We never find out the strength of the evil impulse inside us until we try to fight it: and Christ, because He was the only man who never yielded to temptation, is also the only man who knows to the full what temptation means – the only complete realist.”19
Blessings of Patience
It may be worth noting a few of the blessings promised to the patient:
- When Ammon was reunited with his brothers, he observed that “when our hearts were depressed… the Lord comforted us, and said…bear with patience thine afflictions, and I will give you success.”20 There is some evidence that patience is associated with higher levels of life satisfaction and lower levels of depression or anxiety.21
- Patience is part of the process of nourishing the seed of faith so that it “takes root.”22 Patiently nourishing the seedling of faith eventually results in reaping the rewards of faith, diligence, and patience – which includes spiritually being filled such that we hunger not and thirst not.
- Patience is the path to deliverance from our oppression. The people of Alma faced oppressive burdens at the hands of Amulon. The Lord, in return, granted unto them an interesting blessing: capacity. “The Lord did strengthen them that they could bear up their burdens with ease, and they did submit cheerfully and with patience to all the will of the Lord.” This miracle increased their faith and their patience such that the voice of the Lord returned and promised literal deliverance from bondage, which He provided the following day.23
- The people of Alma also demonstrate our ability to adapt and trust that “all that is unfair about life can be made right through the Atonement of Jesus Christ.”24 Thus, ”patience also means that when something cannot be changed, you come to accept it with courage, grace, and faith.”25
Conclusion
Truly, being “slow to wrath is of great understanding: but [being] hasty of spirit exalteth folly.”26 Maybe, just maybe, patience is the highest Christlike attribute we can seek because it determines the extent to which we can tolerate the path to substantive progress.
Whatever your challenge, experience, or suffering, you are invited to be like the Savior and add patience to your perspective, your attitude, and the way you approach solving poignant problems. You can expect the Lord to reciprocate and, as President Nelson has invited you to do, you can seek and expect the right miracles, at the right time, in the right way.27
- Moroni 10:22 ↩︎
- Oxford Languages, Iniquity (June 2025) ↩︎
- Preach My Gospel, Chapter 6, Seek Christlike Attributes ↩︎
- Seinfeld, “The Merv Griffin Show,” Season 9, Episode 6 ↩︎
- Articles of Faith 1:13, emphasis added ↩︎
- Mosiah 23:21, note that patience is sequenced first (prior to faith). This could speak to the central nature of patience in building other key virtues. ↩︎
- D&C 84:38, emphasis added ↩︎
- Tim Wu, “The Tyranny of Convenience,” New York Times, February 16, 2018. It is worth noting that this author is concerned that convenience, though “an instrument of liberation” has “a dark side…Created to free us, it can become a constraint on what we are willing to do, and thus in a subtle way it can enslave us.” ↩︎
- 1 Corinthians 13:1-4 ↩︎
- Moroni 7:48 ↩︎
- James 1:3-4 ↩︎
- Either 12: 6 ↩︎
- D. Todd Christofferson, “Give Us This Day Our Daily Bread” (Church Educational System fireside, Jan. 9, 2011), lds.org/broadcasts. (see also BYU speech) ↩︎
- Romans 5:3 ↩︎
- Neal A. Maxwell., Patience, BYU Speeches, November 27, 1979 ↩︎
- Mosiah 3:19 ↩︎
- See Ether 12:27 ↩︎
- Dieter F. Uchtdorf, “Continue in Patience,” April Conference, 2010
↩︎ - CS Lewis, “Mere Christianity,” p.142 ↩︎
- Alma 26:27 ↩︎
- Aghababaei N, Tabik MT. Patience and Mental Health in Iranian Students. Iran J Psychiatry Behav Sci. 2015 Sep;9(3):e1252. doi: 10.17795/ijpbs-1252. Epub 2015 Sep 23. PMID: 26576165; PMCID: PMC4644612. ↩︎
- Alma 32:41-43 ↩︎
- Mosiah 24:15-16 ↩︎
- Preach My Gospel, Lesson 2: The Plan of Salvation ↩︎
- Preach My Gospel, Christlike Attributes ↩︎
- Proverbs 14:29 ↩︎
- Nelson, Russel M., “The Power of Spiritual Momentum,” April Conference 2022 ↩︎
